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This LP represents more than a year's worth of people, places, events, and the stories and conversations that resulted from them.


released April 21, 2015

Recorded November 2014 - March 2015 at The Noise Room in Grayslake, IL
Recording, mixing, and mastering by Jeffrey Leber
Trumpet on "If you need a place to stay" by Phillip Christiansen

For Julia Santiago



all rights reserved


Ghost of a Dead Hummingbird Chicago, Illinois


Under the ultraviolet light - June 2016

Sin forma - April 2015

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Track Name: Poor thing
Slow down. Leave my tongue to twitch and you'll remain a knot in my stomach. I want to rip it out, never be sick. Your color still drips from this. All the windows are painted over with dull creations. I fought to look out to the grass where you lay; the soft blades on your skin, and I'd like to be them. Your color painted me that shade. I'm tied to the tracks, but I don't need you to rescue me. I need you to be the train. I need you. I'm not ready to be sick again.
Track Name: If you need a place to stay
I think I'll make these walls like you, another three, another three. I'm speaking in images I'll never see. Writhing in the glass, catch me smiling. Writhing in the glass, push on violently - being gently unaware. The treble. I was in every picture, I listened from the stairwell. Assemble. Resemble.
Track Name: I'm sorry, I'm all out of money
Dead breath on a cigarette, a siren screams, "I bear no forgiveness". Dead breath, "can you guess?" Nothing matters until the camera sweats. (There are) walls that surface over sun spots in the rain. I've lost it all. Sell my insides for an extra bit of cash; you can have it all. I'll help you fall out of your clothes. Left behind the world I once loved. Sign the pardon and escape, sign the pardon and escape. It was just one night, one night, one night. Stitch your eyes to the headlights, forget the ivory tree. It's where the box was born. Worn out and the clock reads it's too late.
Track Name: Drive safe
Here we are again with our hands behind our backs, hoping the weight of the sand won't slip through. But yours are tied, mine are shy. Shiver awake, mirror night. I'm restless, honest. Our intention is to collapse. Not where we started...maybe I'm hard to read. Shiver awake, mirror night.
Track Name: He used to be a dying coyote
Feeding off the shapes and shifting of the pavement, I tried to find the meaning in the distance. Passing all the dreams of steel, what will we name them? Please forgive me, please forgive me for what I've done...for when I'm sin forma. The crippling speed, white knuckle, drink and leave. One single iteration and I'm crawling back to these things. Forty miles of misery, I'm depending on probability. Too frail, too tragic, I'm crawling back to these things.
Track Name: I don't think tonight's a good idea
Paradise seems further than ever, but paradise has come for you. At least it makes you feel something. Paradise seems further than ever, but paradise has come for you, such a quiet place. I watched your eyes grow darker and darker, glazed with the most dismal shade of blue I have ever seen. You will always have his name etched into your skin, so I'll just stay bitter. So you can keep searching and teething for anything to numb, anything to numb the pain and put yourself to sleep. It's not safe to rely on borrowed things. Could I have found a better way to write the ending? It's been a secret for far too long and I won't say a word, I won't say a thing, I'll cut out my tongue to keep from laughing. As the pattern gets more tangled, being subtle is no longer enough. Speak up, speaker.
Track Name: Lover boy (Balbo and State)
High rise morning, then it's south on 90. Even tempered. It's not my fault you're perfect in every way.
Track Name: Mal de muchos...
We walk these empty halls, yet I'm a stranger to your frail bones. We coalesce too fast, too fast. Swaying forms in the doorway, my hurried hands. Passing glances beckon my footsteps. Forget your loved ones, summer 1949. Words bloom up through the stone. Recognition comforts us. Flesh falls like petals, our shallow breath. Tired glimpses through the garden...time well spent. Flesh falls like petals, our shallow breath. "The world is beautiful", she said.
Track Name: ...consuelo de todos
The world is beautiful when I come to. Brighter days in harsh light, don't believe the screams are real. Hid pencils under hospital beds. Father came to visit with books, a reminder that I was loved. More than you could ever give. Tell me it haunts you. Tell me who needs you. I don't mind, I don't mind.